Big Orange Backpack

Before I begin talking about the end of birthright a quick note on how stupid I am.

I've been using a converter that my aunt gave me to charge my computer but it hasn't been working the whole trip, only charging for fifteen seconds on and off for an hour or so. Apparently converters are only supposed to be used short term, and on top of it, my computer's adapter can handle Israeli electricity voltage - so I've been without my computer for no reason for the past two weeks.

Anyway, I was overwhelmed at finishing this blog about birthright because I didn't have a chance to keep up day-to-day, but everyone's emails and facebook messages inspired me.

I missed some stuff from the last entry - not counting the 4 line message from Jerusalem.

I'm totally off on timing, I'm reading off of the itinerary that Jamie sent me, and my days might be off on when we did what where. But ohh wells.

After Shabbos we went to an ancient park, Beit Guvrin. We dug a bit with archaeologists in a cave, I was a bit bored, I'm not sure why, it was really awesome, I think I was just discouraged because everyone around me was finding pottery and bones from 2,000 years ago and I was too lazy to look. I have some good pictures with hoes though. Haha, I meant to make that dirty. We went cave crawling through claustrophbic.. caves.. It was so scary and I was having a panic attack most of the time, but it was really cool. We then went to an absorption centre where we met a whole bunch of Ethopian kids that just moved here, but considering we don't speak Hebrew and they didn't speak English, it was a waste of time. I played soccer with them, but I'm used to being a goalie on grass, and I dove to save the ball, which I did, but I caught it with my face and scraped my knee up and bruised it really well. I felt like a badass. We then drove down into the desert, and the view was unbelievable. I have never in my life seen something that beautiful. We got out and we realised we were all sleeping together on mats in a big tent right next to each other. I called Andrew as my snuggle buddy for the night, and we went out on camels after having a very refreshing watermelon and lemonade. The camel ride was amazing, I think I may've cheated on Greg with three of them. We rode into the desert a bit and turned around, and I rode every turn and never walked - it was SO much fun. I then called Sal from the middle of the desert, which was a weird feeling - talking to him and he sounded so close, but I was so far away. We then had an AMAZING dinner, I was sitting with such fun people, and after a wonderful blessing from Joe we dug into lamb kabob and rice and humus. I tried to sleep after that, but couldn't so I jumped out of the tent and had a bit of hookah before finally crashing. Andrew came into the tent at 1ish and we spooned until 3, when we were awoken to climb Masada. I slept on the way there, and we climbed the hardest trail, the Snake Trail, and I realised how out of fucking shape I am. For the second time, (the first being the bike ride), I had a moment with G-d, begging for strength. I have no idea how I made it to the top. I was so exhausted I really didn't appreciate the view as much as I should have - but it was still SO cool being around all that history. Joe dressed up as King Herod and walked around in the outfit all day - Saar (our tour guide) gave it to him. I was so tired by that point, and starving, and breakfast at the foot of Masada was completely disapointing. We then drove to the Dead Sea, which smelled like spoiled eggs and I didn't go in. All the girls that came out said the salt water hurt their vaginas, and I had the cut from playing soccer the day before, so I layed out and talked to Joe on the sand for two hours before we left.

We then drove to Jerusalem.

Whoa.

We got there, and we stopped on an overlook that showed us the entire city. And it was the best moment of my life. There was music playing when we got off the bus on the huge porch and we all just started dancing and rejoincing and some of us (pleading the fifth) crying. We said some prayers, gave some speeches, and one thing a kid on another bus summed it up "I've loved visiting all these amazing places around Israel, but this isn't a place, this is a feeling." We danced in circles, with each other, it was totally spontanous and magical, and all the other buses joined in.

The next day we went into the Old City. I had been sleeping with Gary and Joe for the past few nights, and stayed with them half the trip, sleeping in between them. Awesome snuggling went down, however, Joe woke me up the night before the Old City coughing in my face, and he got me sick. So the Old City was not as fun as I thought it would be, and on top of it none of us caught up on sleep since the Bedoiun tent. We dragged ourselves all over the city, and on top of it it was about a million degrees. I won't lie, that day wasn't fun, despite being in the Holiest and most amazing city in the world. We went to the Kotel (aka Western/Wailing Wall), which was sort of a disapointment, but I cried when I was praying at it. But I quickly ran to the shade because I was wearing a black sweater and pants (you have to be dressed respectfully while there). I did some shopping with Joe after eating lunch with him and Gary, Diana, and the other Brooklyn College kids and I met a kid from the Upper West Side in a kabab shop. Small world. We then went to the mega event where they played music, had speakers, and a disco situation with every birthright kid there, 7000 of us. I was exhausted and bored and didn't feel like dancing so I just chilled out alone, I needed some time alone after being around people all week.

The next day (8 hours sleep in the past three days), we went to Yad Veshem, the Holocaust Museum. It didn't move me as much as the one in DC did, but walking out and seeing Jerusalem, I felt safe and at home, in the busom of Israel. We then went to Mt Hertzl where they have a military cemetary and the tomb of Theodor Hertzl. I love cemetaries, and this one was the most amazing I've ever been in. It was so amazing and inspiring and sad to see graves of people my age, and younger, who died for the State of Israel, for the safety of Jews from invading Arab armies in four wars, as well as military accidents and terrorist incidents. We then went to Hertzl's tomb, I ran ahead of the group a bit and put a rock on the marble that just read "Hertzl" in Hebrew, on the top of a hill. Then, a military band started playing, not sure why, but I had this moment alone at the tomb with this amazing inspiring music and it was magical. We then had a really nice wrap up circle on the top of a building in a theme park called "mini-Israel" before a short dinner after which birthright was over and everyone got on a plane home, but me.

The last day or two I was getting really claustrophic of not being able to chose when I could wake up, go to sleep, pee, etc. Being around people and nothing having alone time was driving me crazy. But after everyone left and Vita's cousin gave me a ride to my hostel I felt really scared and alone. This morning I woke up so overwhelmed at the fact that I could chose what I did and where I went, I couldn't even get out of my hostel until noon. I went to the Jaffa Flea Market, which we had seen while we were in Tel Aviv but weren't allowed to shop in, and bought some head scarves. The bus ride there was a nightmare, on the way there the bus driver forgot to tell me when to get off and he let me off in a suburb and I had to take a bus back towards Tel Aviv and Jaffa, but that bus driver forgot about me too! So then I had to get on a THIRD bus back towards the outer rim of the city, and this time a passenger told me where to get off and how to get to the market. I walked back into Tel Aviv, sick of the buses, and calmed down about being alone and had a lovely walk by the water, it is so beautiful here I can't take it.

That brings me up to right now, in the hotel we stayed at while we were in Tel Aviv, which is around the corner from my hostel and has free wireless access.

Tomorrow Jake comes in. We're going to go to a disco with two friends from birthright and two soldiers that were with us and the guard that came around with us, Liat. Then we'll just hang out over Shabbos before leaving Sunday night for Cairo. Apparently the bus leaves at 6pm and not 11am as promised on their website.

Phew, done. I have my photos on my facebook, and I'll put on a few here too.

Much love - thanks for the encouragement guys.